Chab Gassie

Update 3 March: The Department of Secret Intelligence announces the completion of the Archibald Prize thing.

The most important home and away season match in any league in Australia is being played in Sydney this Valentine’s Day. I could’ve had, like, 800 hawt dates, but I really do have to watch this game (or go to St Kilda Festival… one of them). The Victory is without Muscat, who got done for smashing some piece of crap Gold Cast player in the face, and Archie Thompson, who tore his quad while dry humping a corner flag. Whoever wins will get to play in the Asian Champion’s League because in this sport there are real rewards for the best teams – they don’t just go down to the pub in Essendon or Geelong and drink for three days.

I predict a 3-1 Victory to Melbourne because Sydney don’t know how to handle pressure and Melbourne wants it pretty badly.

Also, I was painting Joe Hockey for the Archibald Prize, but now I’ve actually read the rules and found out that I have to paint the subject from real life. So the choices were to put on a ninja suit and hide in the top corner of Joe Hockey’s bathroom and paint him without him knowing, or paint somebody I had access too.

The painting is looking good and will be revealed when I remember the password to my secure FTP server. I thought it was ‘balls’ but it’s not.

I did the second choice – not painting naked Joe Hockey.